HACKING & PACKING:

THE UNOFFICIAL ALESSA & ARROW JOKE BOOK 

The jokes Alessa and @DirtyHackz told each other. Because hacking isn’t the only thing they’re good at… 😏

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💻 Alessa: "Why do hackers like anal?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Oh god, I don’t even wanna know."
💋 Alessa: "Because they always go through the backdoor."

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💻 Arrow: "What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "Oh no, do I want to know?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "I want you inside me." 😏

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💻 Alessa: "What do hackers and bad boyfriends have in common?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "They both ghost you after getting what they want?"
💋 Alessa: "Close. They both leave you vulnerable to brute force attacks." 😈

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💻 Arrow: "If a hacker was into foreplay, what would be their favourite move?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "Please don’t say penetration testing."
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Penetration testing." 😏

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💻 Alessa: "Why don’t hackers ever get married?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Because they prefer open-source relationships?"
💋 Alessa: "No, because they know how easy it is to be exploited."

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💻 Arrow: "How do hackers flirt?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "Badly?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "They send unsolicited packages and hope for remote access." 🤣

💻 Alessa: "Jesus Christ..."

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💻 Alessa: "If you were a hacker, what’s the sexiest thing you could say to a woman?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Your mainframe looks vulnerable. Mind if I… insert a stronger firewall?"
💋 Alessa: "Oh my god. That’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard. But also? I respect it."

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💻 Arrow: "How do hackers make sure their nudes stay secure?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "They don’t take them in the first place?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Nope, they encrypt them with a 2048-bit key and only give access to verified users." 🔐

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💻 Alessa: "Arrow, what’s the fastest way to get arrested for cybercrime?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Trying to hack the government?"
💋 Alessa: "No. Googling ‘how to hack into someone’s heart’ and getting caught."

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💻 Arrow: "What does a hacker say after a successful penetration test?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "Please don’t."
👨‍💻 Arrow: "‘That was easy. Let’s try another entry point.’" 😈

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💻 Alessa: "Why don’t hackers last long in bed?"
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Oh, I’ve gotta hear this one."
💋 Alessa: "Because they’re used to instant access."

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💻 Arrow: "What’s a hacker’s favourite position?"
👩‍💻 Alessa: "I am not answering that."
👨‍💻 Arrow: "Firewall bypass. Always looking for a way around the restrictions."

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🔥 That’s it, love! Thanks for checking out this completely inappropriate, mildly offensive, and 100% hacker-approved joke book.

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💬 Which joke was your favourite? Let me know!

 

📖 P.S. If you haven’t pre-ordered Savage Saint yet… do it now before I send Arrow to hack your Kindle. 😈​

 

👉 US PRE-ORDER LINK | UK PRE-ORDER LINK​

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